So this morning Dr. Stanley's sermon was on the process of "sifting" that God will put us through in order to make us suitable for service to Him (sifting being the process by which the actual usable part of wheat is separated from the unusable portion, or "chaff" as it is called). In closing out the sermon Dr. Stanley encouraged the congragation to go before God and seek out whatever sort of chaff He would identify in our lives for removal. The scary thing is, I think I was getting my answer before the suggestion was fully made (I don't think I even had a real clue as to what the suggestions was going to be) and the frustrating thing is that what has been pointed out to me is something I don't think I want to let go of.
So now I have this rather unpleasant flesh vs. spirit sort of battle going on in my head/heart and I really am not sure where the battle lines are, what's on who's side, what the rules of engagement are or anything. Intel is falling down on the job so to speak. Of course, Dr. Stanley did point out that the sifting process isn't exactly a pleasant one. Just pray that I will seek after and find God's will, and then that I will be willing to trust and follow it.
(throw on top of this a paper or two due almost every week until school is over and I may just about reach the edge of my sanity. This could get interesting...)
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